Life coming together
Found meaning, found love, and found myself.
Everything has changed
I think I ended up skipping a weekend, but now I'm here again (don't worry, hehe). Last time, I wrote that I didn't really know where Lulu and I were headed. Whether we would ever see each other again, or whether that had been the last time - I didn't know. A lot has happened since then. We talked everything through and have hung out several times since ... she's actually even been to my place here in Hillerød. I remember being afraid to give my heart to someone again because I was scared of getting hurt and because it's been SO long since I've met someone who just feels RIGHT - I actually don't think I've felt that way about anyone since 2024. I was very cautious with Lulu, not because of who she is, but more because I've been too afraid to "take the leap". I remember that evening (the weekend I last wrote), when I told her, "I don't think we'll ever end up together." I remember shaking and wanting to cry more than anything - but I tried to put on a tough front so I would seem like the strong one? I got it completely wrong because that wasn't what I actually wanted. It was just my fear trying to push away the best person I've met in a long time.
Learning to love again
One evening, Lulu suddenly messaged me to ask if she could come over. At first, I actually thought it was a joke because, honestly, I never thought she would come to my place. I remember being SO NERVOUS when I went down to the station to pick her up. I think I'll probably still feel nervous when I see her for quite a while. As I tell her, I'm always a little nervous, but I just need a little time to warm up. We always have good conversations, and we can laugh, be silly, and relax together. She's the one who really makes me happy and makes me feel like I have a sense of purpose again - before, everything just felt monotonous.
A good winter
I can feel now that this winter will be one I'll actually enjoy. I'll be happy again, and I'll be able to stand being at home again, too. Lulu brought my happiness back and really made me believe in love again - however cliché that might sound. I'm planning to spend Halloween, Christmas, and New Year's Eve with her. I love you <3